People From Around The World Share Their Worst Tattoo Stories
It may be cliché to say "will you still like that tattoo when you are 90?" but there is some wisdom there. A lot of people make bad decisions when it comes to permanent tattoos. From stupid jokes that are old 3 months from now, to names of ex-lovers, to just about anything in-between, tattoo artists have seen it all. And luckily for us, they are willing to share the horrible decisions these people have made.
Fingers crossed your tattoo doesn't show up on this list.
42. Why would anyone think this is ok
was in a shop once when a lady came in with her daughter in a stroller. The little girl had to have been 9 months old tops.
Lady wanted the tattoo artist to give her 9-month-old a Mickey Mouse tattoo. The artist just looked her in the face and said, "
You shouldn't be allowed to have that baby" and the woman and her friend stormed out calling the artist a racist.
No one laughed, because everyone knew she would just go find someone with a home kit and have it done.
They were going to call Child Protective Services but no one could get their license plate number before they sped off.
Piercing a baby's ears or getting them tattooed is awful parenting. You gotta wait for the kid to be old enough to weigh the consequences themselves.
41. Sounds pretty neat, honestly
I was getting my ribs done by Steve Moore at his shop and I asked him what the weirdest tattoo he had ever done was.
He said hands down it was the one he did on Montell Williams, the talkshow host.
Most people don't know this about Montel, but he is an avid snowboarder and is extremely passionate about it.
He wasn't very good, but he was focused on improving and learning tricks. Every weekend he would go snowboarding in the winter and would often be spotted in Whistler for vacations.
I once delivered a can of coke to his room, a little let down his wife answered the order but, whatever.
So Montel reached out to Steve and commissioned him to do a piece on him. We wanted a 1/2 man 1/2 panther riding a snowboard.
Steve obliged well because money and said it was the cheesiest piece he has ever done.
40. Sound advice, though
The head gasket of my friend's car blew when he, I, and one other friend were driving home from a weekend of partying two states away (life lesson, kids.
The answer to, "When was the last time you added coolant?" should not be "Coolant?"). We got towed to the nearest "city": Ottumwa, Iowa.
It happened to be Sunday and Ottumwa is the type of town that had no auto shops open until Monday, so we spent the entire day drinking in our hotel room and then gracing whatever establishments served drinks as they opened for business.
At some point, a joke started cumulating about what would be the stupidest tattoo possible to commemorate the trip.
The end product was a tow truck labeled Gus (the name of our tow truck driver) towing a coffee pot (one of our limited drinking vessels in the hotel room), and some words of wisdom from one bartender ("
Don't go to Scooters" [local bar that's now closed and had a reputation for being unfriendly to non-locals] and "Don't pay with plastic"
[don't use credit cards at another bar known for adding bogus charges to your bill]). The bartender who offered the quotes also helped us design the tattoo on a bar napkin because we were all far too inebriated to draw a straight line.
Eventually, my friend declared that if we could find an open tattoo parlor (it was about midnight at this point), he would have the ink added to his body.
I imagine he felt safe making that declaration, because why would there be a tattoo parlor open in Ottumwa, Iowa in the middle of the night?
Well, there was a tattoo parlor open at midnight in Ottumwa, Iowa.
Kind of.
What there really was, was a handbag store that, for some reason, I do not understand, had a tattoo parlor in the basement.
Thanks to being in the magical place where all bad ideas seem like great ideas, my friend now has a tow truck towing a coffee pot and some words of wisdom regarding a small town in Iowa gracing one of his legs, just above the kneecap.
39. Hail
In the little college town I live in, all these girls want a cross on their wrist to show how “spiritual” they are. Whatever.
Every one of them wants me to put the cross so it’s facing them.
That’s upside down to everyone who sees it. These sweet college girls are getting upside down crosses and looking like Satan’s little devils.
I do ask them if they know it’s upside down. In true self-centered college girl fashion, they invariably reply, “it’s right-side-up to ME!”
Like the other billions of people on the planet don’t matter.
Okay, Brayden. One upside down cross, coming up.
